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[lily e. shaw]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 350px; height: 380px; background-color:#E3E3E3; border-left: 30px solid #883a2f; border-bottom:30px solid #883a2f; border-top:30px solid #883a2f; border-right: 30px solid #883a2f;] lily hadn't really been around long enough to meet anyone. she'd arrived the previous day, after the other patients had lunch. her mother was strutting in front of her and lily couldn't comprehend exactly why she had to do this. "it's until you get better," her mother had said. lily called bullshit. she highly doubted this was going to get better. but she knew better than to reply, and from the time that her mother had spoken about white springs to when she arrived, she had kept her mouth shut tight around mom. the check-in had also apparently been "confiscate everything possible"--cell phones, safety pins (that she didn't even know could be used to cut until today!), and okay, a pencil sharpener and screwdriver she tried to sneak in, but she'd been 99% sure it wasn't going to work anyways. the rest of the time had been keeping her mouth shut and going through the motions until she had time to escape outside, bringing a bracelet in the making with her. it was gray, quite like the sky right now. five shades of gray, to be exact. lily thought it would be hilarious if it was fifty shades of gray, but she didn't have enough shades. and anyways, that book deserved to be incinerated. preferably along with this rehabilitation facility itself. whatever lily's problems were, they were not things that could be fixed by rehab. rehab was for drugs. rehab was for drunk celebrities. rehab was not

[/b] for sixteen-year-old girls who had a bit of a bad habit.

lily finished off the bracelet and tied a knot. she reached for where the scissors usually were but found grass instead. and then she remembered--she wasn't allowed to have scissors. the paranoia of this place was otherworldly. yesterday dinner a doctor had passed her cutting her chicken and had shot her a suspicious look. for god's sake, she wasn't going to up and start slicing her wrists in the middle of dinner! this whole place pissed her off. being sent to white springs was perhaps the worst punishment she could think of.

at least it would be over sometime. lily didn't know when. they'd release her when she was "rehabilitated". no idea when that would be. she leaned back on the tree she was sitting against, half-heartedly attempting to sever the strings with her teeth. it didn't work. she tried with her nails. she sighed. loudly. "of course, wise-ass," she said to herself, "you're an idiot."
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notes, this is really bad. meh. need to practice.
word count, 410

thanks brooklyn from atf

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[Christine E. Jones]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 420px; height: 500px; border: 6px dashed #7a7a7a; background:#d5d6d7;] *they cut you in the coldest spot * Christine Eliana Jones questions for questions i've got a question would you ever dance with me like that? Chris had managed to get away without eating just yet, claiming she felt rather ill. Since she wasn't a fan of the other option, she really played it up in her room. Thankfully the orderly finally gave up after an hour of trying to get her to eat something. She waited out for a few hours after that. Accepting an apple that was handed to her by someone in the cafeteria. The same orderly probably. Chris just made a scowl when she turned her back, heading out the door's throwing them open almost angrily. This place really pissed her off. She didn't even need to be here, James thought she had a problem, and because she wasn't an adult yet, she had no say in the matter. Chris's father never cared. But of course he was an alcoholic and spent most of his time drunk. She preferred it that way. The apple in her hand finally registered. As she grew closer to a few trees, she chucked the stupid thing into them. Watching with a smirk as it was completely demolished upon impact. Satisfied with her work she headed on her way. Noticing another girl while walking, sitting on the ground against another tree. Fiddling with string. How weird. Chris wasn't a bully, but she was definitely an asshole. As she got closer she heard the other girl mutter something. Something about her being an idiot. "Talk to yourself much? Chris came to a stop, almost looming over the poor girl with a mildly incredulous expression. She shoved her hands in her pockets as her mouth drew into a frown. She hadn't met anyone here yet either. Chris didn't go out of her way to socialize most of the time. "What are you in for, princess?" Her tone wasn't taunting. It was another habit of hers to give people nicknames even if they didn't want them. She'd continue using them too. status; finished words; 319 tags;; Lily Credit goes to 愛 T E C H N O of BTN

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[lily e. shaw]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 350px; height: 380px; background-color:#E3E3E3; border-left: 30px solid #883a2f; border-bottom:30px solid #883a2f; border-top:30px solid #883a2f; border-right: 30px solid #883a2f;] lily glanced up and started. she had been focusing so much on the repetitive motion of making the bracelet and her thoughts that she hadn't noticed the girl approach. the girl was about her age, with red hair, and she was relatively pretty. lily might have seen her around a couple times, but she wasn't distinctive enough to notice. she opened her mouth to say hello, but the girl had already asked lily something about talking to herself - which wasn't all that weird, actually - but that was just her opinion. she asked lily what she was in for, and added "princess" to it, which was a little irritating. lily wondered if her clothes looked expensive. they weren't. she'd gotten them seventy percent off with a couple coupons and a sale. lily raised one eyebrow slightly, realizing how she wasn't fond of the fact that she was sitting down so the other girl looked as if she was towering over her, so she stood up, brushing off her black jeans as she did so and stuffing the string into the pocket of her sweater. "um, i guess i'm in for self-harm," she said nervously. she hated saying it, even though she'd realized that in here, introducing yourself by your mental disorder was like introducing yourself by what classes you were in at school. it sounded so much worse than it actually was, and a lot more violent as well. anyways, she wasn't even really in for self-harm - she was in for anxiety and depression, which resulted in self harm ... but lily really didn't feel like explaining it, so she just let it go. "what about you?" notes, this is even worse pffff. word count, 273 thanks brooklyn from atf

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[Christine E. Jones]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 420px; height: 500px; border: 6px dashed #7a7a7a; background:#d5d6d7;] *they cut you in the coldest spot * Christine Eliana Jones questions for questions i've got a question would you ever dance with me like that? Chris watched the girl stand up, after fidgeting with a bunch of string. It was actually pretty strange, she'd never seen someone with that much string just sitting outside with it. It almost seemed to enhance the 'crazy' atmosphere that was already here. She took a note of the contemplation that crossed the girl's face momentarily when she called her princess. It wasn't enough to tell her whether it was liked or disliked. But usually with her luck, disliked. Whatever. Chris didn't make any face at the girl's admittance to being here due to self harm. Surprisingly, she didn't really judge that one much. She'd had a cousin that when they were children, was close to, who started doing things like that. Chris had pulled away then, she was horrible at comforting people. The rift still stood between them, the problem made her uncomfortable though. "I see. What's all that string for?" Truthfully, she hadn't even noticed the string until the girl fidgeted with it. This time though the question the girl asked, made her hesitate. Chris's eyes darted away, she almost scoffed at the question. It wasn't like she believed she had a problem, the scowl returned to her face though. "Apparently an eating disorder. But I'm pretty sure that I'm fine, let alone should probably be a Level One instead of Two.... Hey, this is probably extremely personal but..." Her gaze came back to the girl. Chris was already aware she was being pushy. That was her though. "How can someone... do that to themselves? Really not trying to sound like one of those judgemental assholes, i'm just curious." She shrugged it off and tossed her eyes a bit. Glad that she didn't have to eat that apple, and had only tomorrow to deal with now. Well, if the snack wasn't mandatory. But if she asked about that, it'd probably seem like she had a problem. When she certainly didn't. "What's your name, princess?" notes; not bad <3 words; 323 tags;; Lily Credit goes to 愛 T E C H N O of BTN

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[lily e. shaw]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 350px; height: 380px; background-color:#E3E3E3; border-left: 30px solid #883a2f; border-bottom:30px solid #883a2f; border-top:30px solid #883a2f; border-right: 30px solid #883a2f;] the other girl stayed completely poker-faced as lily admitted her reason for being here, which wasn't a surprise. whenever lily had told anyone, they'd had that same face. hell, she'd walked past her guidance counselor in a tank top and short shorts on the last day of middle school and she'd observed that face. then she got in inquiry about the string. "oh," she said. "i make bracelets. in my spare time. mostly because i'm bored." the string was actually cheaper than buying a ton of bracelets to cover the worst of the cutting, and it passed the time too, which was exactly what lily needed. so apparently the girl was here for an eating disorder. she looked uncomfortable as she said it as well. looks like not everyone enjoys advertising their disorders, observed lily. and another that's sure they're fine when eating disorders really aren't. well, a girl who didn't eat and didn't think that was wrong was one thing. a girl who drew bright red lines across her skin with a silver pencil and didn't think that was wrong was another. and then the girl said that she was going to ask something personal before launching into a small tangent about how someone could do that to themselves, and lily froze, her head starting to pound. "um," she said. why exactly did she do this to herself? by now, it was more of a need than anything, but why had lily started in the first place? she'd heard all these stories about girls who had been sexually abused or gone through traumatizing things, and it always made her feel awful because the only thing she'd gone through was a slight drop in grades and a bit of worry. and then the fact that she was so terrible usually led to her slamming the door and picking up the blade again. it was a viscous cycle, and one that was hard to break. "i don't know, actually," said lily. she glanced down. "there's, like, a lot of reasons. like - like..." lily stopped, realizing she didn't have to tell the girl if she didn't want to. but placing herself into that triggering place was setting her off. she crossed her arms, feeling self-conscious. "well, i think you said it. it's extremely personal." lily couldn't describe her relief when the conversation veered into safer territory and the girl asked her name. "lily," she said shortly. "what's yours?" notes, and i get really rambly here. word count, 407 thanks brooklyn from atf

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