Post by jordan m. dawson on Aug 14, 2012 16:02:32 GMT -5
| [atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, width: 400px; height: 250px; overflow:auto; border-left: 10px solid #657f86; background: #FCFEF5; opacity: 0.8; border-top-right-radius:60px; border-bottom-left-radius:60px;] Jordan Michael Dawson  18 || Level 2|| Drug Abuse || Tyler Blackburn || Male I’ve never really been one to write down how I’m feeling. But the doctors told me that I needed to start taking journal entries-something about helping my subconscious be able to change in order to fix my addiction. I don’t live at White Springs, but with my parents not far from here. It has been a long time since I have done anything worthy of surveillance, but apparently my treatment isn’t finished. When I was around thirteen my friends starting getting mixed up in some pretty weird crowds. They were ‘anti-drug’ users and they’d beat up other people for fun. Straight edge if you know what that is. Anyway, I didn’t really want to get involved in all the violence. I’m generally a very calm individual and like to make friends who I can just sit and talk with. Well, the kids that my group of friends would target were always nice to me and invited me to their...activities. I didn’t want to start doing it. It was the peer pressure and the smell in the air that made me decide I’d give it a go. The stuff they gave me made me calm and they’d all relax and be chill, which is what I liked. When it started effecting me negatively I barely even noticed until my parents realized what I’d been doing. I had been taking drugs, don't really know the names of them just that they were considered bad drugs. Ones that'd make me feel light and feathery, others made me hyper but I mostly stuck with the ones that would calm me down. Relax me. I like the feeling because it's soothing. I can honestly say that it's developed to a point where I go searching for it. It's just harder to picture life without the result in my system, rushing through my blood and into my brain. It has taken a lot of work the last few years to ween from it. I've had several drawback s and relapses. I'll shake uncontrollably and beg someone to give me something, anything to calm me down. They've stopped giving me medication as often because they knew it was just another addiction forming. My old group of friends has beaten me up along with my new friends several times now. I have a few pretty bad scars and bruises from it, but nothing too bad. My parents have a really good relationship with White Springs and I’m here for a few hours every day and for events. I just don’t get it. What’s wrong with being with friends and using help to keep a relaxed atmosphere? Anyway, I’m supposed to be learning how to change. How to not believe in or like the things I’d been doing. It’s been about...three years now since I’ve had access to anything really. Still not sure what I was doing wrong. Maybe I’m in denial, maybe I’m not. Suzie || 21 || 6yrs || Sho did. |
